When Stephen Colbert watched Chicago Cubs first baseman Frank Schwindel pitch in aid throughout an 18-4 loss to the New York Yankees a number of weeks in the past, the late-night speak present host was amused by his eephus pitch.
“I’m no baseball player,” Colbert mentioned on “The Late Show.” “And neither apparently is Frank Schwindel.”
Instead of laughing alongside and having fun with the nationwide shout-out, the normally easy-going Schwindel took umbrage final week when requested about Colbert’s comment.
“I didn’t appreciate that one,” Schwindel mentioned. “I’d like to see him do it.”
That’s one thing we each can agree on. I’d additionally wish to see Colbert pitch for the Cubs. He couldn’t do a lot worse than the present bunch, and we have already got uninterested in watching Schwindel pitch on the finish of lopsided video games.
Colbert made his one and solely look at Wrigley Field in September 2016, when he threw out a ceremonial first pitch disguised as a sizzling canine vendor named Donny Franks. It grew to become a hilarious section of Colbert’s present a number of weeks later.
While listening to Colbert speak within the Cubs dugout that afternoon in regards to the many neighborhoods he lived in throughout his Northwestern and Second City days, you would inform he actually loved being on the sector. He professed a love for Wrigley Field and recalled going to video games to observe some unhealthy Cubs groups within the Nineties.
Inviting Colbert again to Wrigley for a pitch-off with Schwindel would appear like a no brainer for the Cubs advertising division and its trusty sidekick, the Marquee Sports Network. A Colbert-Schwindel matchup not solely would give followers one thing to stay up for throughout this misplaced season, it would assist them deal with the Cubs’ plight.
We might all use a number of laughs lately.
The present Cubs most likely are too younger to appreciate the workforce as soon as was a staple of late-night speak present jokes. It solely made sense primarily based on the group’s lengthy historical past of sucking. During a season-opening 14-game shedding streak in 1997, supervisor Jim Riggleman addressed among the pictures Jay Leno and David Letterman took on the Cubs on their late-night speak reveals.
“No one likes to be the brunt of jokes, the Jay Leno stuff,” Riggleman mentioned. “I haven’t seen it, but I heard about it. But this is the situation we put ourselves in.”
Of course, the abuse was merited, even when it was not appreciated.
“I’ve never had time for sarcasm,” Riggleman mentioned. “It’s a cheap laugh. It’s very easy for people to use sarcasm. A lot of people use it … it’s their shtick. There will always be a market for it, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.”
Years later, supervisor Joe Maddon used sarcasm to nice impact along with his “Try Not to Suck” slogan in 2016. But not everybody can chortle at themselves the way in which Maddon did.
Talk present hosts modified through the years, and so did the Cubs, who lastly ended their championship drought underneath Maddon in 2016. The Cubs might need thought late-night jokes at their expense had been historical past after the historic World Series win, particularly after Anthony Rizzo, David Ross and Dexter Fowler portrayed male strippers on “Saturday Night Live.” Instead of being the punchline, a trio of Cubs gladly twerked on late-night TV for laughs.
But now the Cubs have returned to their roots, making them fodder for comedians and talk-show hosts in all places. And with accidents to Marcus Stroman and Wade Miley, two veteran starters introduced in to attempt to make a rebuilding workforce respectable, it might solely worsen.
Ross, the previous SNL twerker and “Dancing With the Stars” alum, finds himself in command of a workforce quickly slipping into oblivion. After Monday’s 12-1 loss at Pittsburgh, the Cubs’ June ERA stood at 6.79, greater than a run greater than the second worst workforce — the Washington Nationals at 5.42.
Matt Swarmer was scheduled to pitch Tuesday night time for a membership that has allowed double-digit runs in 4 of its final 9 video games, shedding by scores of 18-4, 12-5, 19-5 and 12-1. Without a slaughter rule to cease the bleeding, the Cubs are pressured to go all 9 innings.
Without even trying up the worst month of pitching in Cubs historical past, the one which sticks in my thoughts was June 1999, an ordinary of futility that defied perception. Under fun-loving pitching coach Marty DeMerritt, the Cubs employees compiled a 6.58 ERA that month, serving up 43 house runs in 27 video games.
The lack of Kerry Wood to elbow surgical procedure earlier than the season harm, however the Cubs nonetheless had veteran starters with first rate monitor information in Steve Trachsel, Kevin Tapani, Jon Lieber and Terry Mulholland, and a younger stud named Kyle Farnsworth. All of them collapsed on the identical time, taking a contending workforce down with them. The ’99 Cubs started the month seven video games over .500 and one recreation out of first place within the National League Central, however ended it at .500, 6½ video games again on their strategy to a 95-loss season.
DeMerritt was a professional wrestling fan who believed he might get extra out of his pitchers by speaking them up as one of many league’s finest staffs. The joke was on him.
“I came in with my spit and vinegar, saying we were going to do this and do that, because I felt that at the time,” DeMerritt mentioned after being fired together with Riggleman and different coaches. “But as things unraveled, certain things didn’t happen. I guess it’s easier to fire a few than numerous.”
As Greg Maddux as soon as mentioned, one of many keys to succeeding within the recreation was understanding which coaches to not hearken to. DeMerritt was a type of.
Of course, 1999 was in the course of the Steroids Era when hitters dominated. The major-league batting common was .271 with a .434 slugging share. Hitters struck out solely 16.4% of the time.
Baseball is now dominated by pitchers. Entering Tuesday, the league common was .241 with a .392 slugging share and a 22% strikeout fee. That makes watching Cubs pitchers battle a way more onerous process than in ‘99.
True to kind, the Cubs on Monday despatched Adrian Sampson, who tossed 4⅔ scoreless innings Sunday towards the Atlanta Braves, right down to Triple-A Iowa. The transfer was made to scale back the employees to the mandated 13 pitchers, and Sampson was deemed expendable for the second. Ross advised reporters in Pittsburgh it was an “extremely difficult” dialog as a result of the choice was not “performance-based.”
When you’ve baseball’s worst employees in June and ship down the one man who has pitched nicely, one thing positively is out of whack.
It’s one more reason why late-night speak present hosts aren’t laughing with the Cubs, they’re laughing at them.
Just just like the outdated days.
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Source: www.bostonherald.com