For 4 depressing years, Jim “Jones” Lyons operated the Massachusetts GOP the way in which his namesake, the Rev. Jim Jones, ran his suicidal demise cult within the Seventies.
Now, lower than a 12 months after his ouster as capo di tutti frutti, it’s time for the bust-out Republican loser to start composing his remaining phrases to his toothless, destitute followers.
And it appears solely acceptable that Lyons ought to use the message of his namesake, the unique Jim Jones, when he urged his Kool Aid Kult in Guyana to drink deeply of the poisoned chalice:
“Take our life from us. We laid it down, we got tired. We didn’t commit suicide, we committed an act of revolutionary suicide protesting the conditions of an inhumane world.”
An inhumane world – that’s precisely how the Kult would describe the forces which can be driving them off the political cliff.
Their final hope for salvation – on this veil of tears, anyway – was to reclaim management of the state’s GOP state committee within the major elections in March and reinstall Lyons lengthy sufficient to complete off the Republican get together as soon as and for all.
But now the official nomination papers are out from the Secretary of State’s workplace. And it seems that not solely has the Kult did not nominate sufficient zombies to oust their foes, however most of the card-carrying Kult members have fled into the bush quite than guzzle the Kool Aid.
Lyons’ state committee incumbents aren’t even ready to be crushed by the forces of normalcy — you understand, Republicans who truly wish to win elections.
Among these state committee members who’ve fled the sector the place they’ve misplaced so many current elections are Amanda Orlando, the marketing campaign supervisor for Geoff “DoorDash” Diehl, the worst candidate for governor within the historical past of Massachusetts.
Patricia St. Aubin, “the cat lady” from my district, is gone. Ditto, the rabidly anti-gay Deb Martell. And Deb Dugan, who voted to retain Lyons as chairman though she’d posted her signal on social media saying “Home Sold,” which means she wasn’t even eligible to vote.
Also calling it a profession is Eleanor Green, who owns some bars in Boston with a considerable homosexual clientele. Now she gained’t must reply for these demented anti-transgender tweets the state committee posted on Lyons’ watch.
Eleanor’s even odder male counterpart, Brendan O’Connell, can be completed. No doubt he’ll miss the washroom amenities at get together headquarters in Woburn the place in the course of the Kult regime he often carried out his day by day ablutions like, you understand, shaving.
Others within the Kool Aid Kult appear doomed to defeat. Maria Collins, who indicators on to Jones’ frivolous lawsuits, is being against the very talked-about mayor of Taunton, Shaunna O’Connell.
You see, within the mayor’s election final month, which she gained handily, O’Connell discovered that her opponent had been endorsed by DoorDash Diehl, considered one of Lyons’ high stooges.
DoorDash, an Uber driver by commerce, now works for 1A Auto. That’s Rick Green’s firm. Green has solely personally misplaced one race for workplace however he’s backed also-rans John Kasich and Ron DeSantis for president.
Lyons was relying on operating considered one of Diehl’s coworkers at 1A, Dean Tran, the ex-senator, for state committee. Sadly, Tran was simply indicted for committing welfare fraud. That was a federal rap, on high of two earlier state indictments.
Here’s only one indication of the electoral prowess of the Kool-Aid Kult. Last 12 months Tran, in a photograph end with a number of grand juries, bought 36.4% of the vote in his Congressional run. Diehl, his coworker at 1A Auto, solely managed an much more pathetic 34.6% of the vote.
What goes round, comes round. Consider Todd Taylor of Chelsea, who shouldn’t be solely on the Committee however was additionally on Jim Jones’ committee payroll, for “voter outreach.” Taylor definitely did a bang-up job – simply ask DoorDash and Tran, amongst so many others.
But Taylor had {qualifications} past being on the state committee. His spouse Regina is likewise a member. Wives seldom vote towards the man who employs their husbands, not if you understand what’s good to your checking account.
But now Taylor (who was himself crushed in his run for state rep final 12 months) faces an opponent named John Olds. The attention-grabbing truth about Olds is that he was the marketing campaign supervisor for Rep. Lenny Mirra, who misplaced his re-election marketing campaign by a single vote – one vote, in a disputed recount.
If the Kool Aid Kult mounted even token opposition to the Democrats within the elections final 12 months – if Diehl had been capable of handle even 35% of the vote — there would have been no recount, as a result of Mirra would have been re-elected.
And Olds won’t be operating.
Kathy Lynch, a dreadful outdated woman who bizarrely poses on social media holding gourds, will probably be crushed by Beth Lindstrom, the previous Senate candidate.
Committeeman Steven Fruzzetti is knowledgeable canine walker from Milton. He was a Cruz man in 2016, like Lyons. They hated Trump. Now he’s operating towards a former Braintree metropolis councilor, Sean Powers. My prediction is Fruzzetti goes to have a “ruff” time profitable one other time period.
Dennis Galvin, a constitution member of the Kool Kult and a retired state cop grabbing a $94,623-a-year pension, goes to lose to Mark Bodanza, a six-term metropolis councilor from Leominster.
Bodanza has by no means misplaced a combat. That’s why the Kool Aid Kult hates him.
Only losers want apply to the Kool Aid Kult. Among their heroes are Jay McMahon (four-time loser from Plymouth) and naturally Door Dash Diehl (three-time loser).
The Rev. Jim Jones Lyons himself is one other three-time loser — as soon as as a Republican, and twice when he was a Democrat when Reagan was president. His fourth drubbing got here when he ran for re-election as get together chairman final January.
Now, at age 69, he retains submitting ever extra frivolous lawsuits. Jones-Lyons is thisclose to turning into a kind of shuffling, stumbling outdated cranks who recordsdata their very own complaints – professional se, because it’s known as, normally handwritten in pencil on authorized pads.
By the way in which, Jim, how’s that $70,000 lawsuit that UPS filed towards your little tree-stand coming alongside? Have you filed a response but?
March 4 – election day – goes to be lots of enjoyable. Don’t fear, Kool Aid Kult, you’ll be listening to so much from me earlier than then. You nugatory losers can run however you possibly can’t cover.
As for you Jim Jones Lyons, begin rehearsing that little exhortation you’re going to must make to your disciples very shortly:
“Take our life from us. We laid it down, we got tired….”
But not as drained as the remainder of us bought of you and nasty, loser antics.
(Order Howie’s new e-book, “Paper Boy: Read All About It!” at howiecarrshow.com or amazon.com.)
Source: www.bostonherald.com”