Worst. Governor. Ever.
That’s not precisely breaking information about Gov. Charlie Baker after all. At least since he ginned up The Panic in 2020, he’s been the native model of his hero, Dementia Joe Biden, who in his senility calls Tall Deval “Gov. Charlie Parker.”
But the fireplace Thursday on the Orange Line ought to function the exclamation level for the Parker error, er, period.
I used to trip the outdated elevated Orange Line from Sullivan Square to Dover again within the days when it was nicknamed, amongst different issues, “the Rattler.” It was by far probably the most dependable line, regardless of the occasional lightning strike, snowstorm or bum from the outdated Pine Street Inn wandering onto the tracks proper the place the practice went underground on the fringe of Chinatown.
But Thursday was the primary time the State Police ever needed to be referred to as to conduct Orange Line rescue operations – in a ship!
The movies of the fireplace from the visitors helicopters are positively cinematic – in Hollywood they’re already placing collectively pitches and situations for the subsequent massive catastrophe film.
Working title: Bridge Over the River Mystic.
New indicators are additionally being ready for Charlie’s “rapid transit” traces:
“No Smoking Permitted – Unless Train Is On Fire.”
Given the continued MBTA fiasco, the brand new trains about to enter service will now be refitted with cushions, full with indicators:
“In the unlikely event of a water landing, cushions may be used as flotation devices.”
If the Olympics hadn’t been cancelled right here, they might have launched a brand new competitors: the Orange Line Triathlon. On the southern finish, round Forest Hills, the straphangers would dash to flee the random gunfire within the neighborhoods. Downtown, when the practice crapped out, because it invariably does, as a substitute of ready for the dreadful shuttle buses, they might cycle.
And then, after all, north of Sullivan Square it will be time for the swimming competitors – all strokes allowed.
The downside for Charlie Parker is, he’s been governor for eight years. The T has been a catastrophe for generations, however he promised to repair it.
Here are a few of the indignant statements the governor made after what at the moment are solely the second-worst T disasters ever, within the winter of 2015:
“Let me make this clear. We cannot continue to do the same thing and expect a different result.”
After which he stored doing precisely the identical factor – nothing – for 2 catastrophically corrupt and incompetent phrases as governor. And now everybody feels the identical approach he did when he stood in entrance of the cameras in 2015.
“I’m sorta done with excuses, okay?” he mentioned in a press release that hasn’t aged effectively, to say the least. “I want to hear what people are actually gonna do to get the riding public back to the point where people can rely on and depend upon this service.”
Can we quote you on that, Gov. Parker?
When the vaccine rollout was botched, like every little thing else in his administration, he famously erupted in fake anger, “My hair’s on fire.”
Now the Orange Line is on fireplace, they usually’ll be making motion pictures about it.
Thirty Seconds Over Somerville.
Parker admitted the blaze was a “colossal failure,” however then shrugged it off.
“The T first of all is not a mess. On a day like today yeah it’s a mess but overall it’s not a mess.”
I’m stunned he didn’t blame the fireplace on Trump, the best way he used to do for every little thing else. Tall Deval additionally claims the entire breakdown of MBTA service will not be the rationale ridership is plummeting so precipitously.
“Do I think that is the reason that people aren’t coming to work? There’s nothing in the data that supports that. What the data basically says is that a lot of people figured out they could do their jobs without being in the office five days a week.”
Could that probably a part of the issue – that the MBTA mechanics aren’t within the “office” 5 days every week (as in the event that they ever have been)?
What is the state’s worst governor doing in these closing days, aside from making pathetic excuses to his calamitous misgoverance?
He’s nominating nonetheless extra ravenous, failed attorneys to the bench.
Here’s considered one of his newest nominations for district court docket choose: Jon L. Revelli, with glittering tutorial credentials from Westfield State and New England School of Law. Revelli is from, look ahead to it, Shrewsbury – hometown of the lieutenant governor, Karen “Pay to Play” Polito.
Polito says Revelli is “well-qualified,” and certainly he’s – he’s given her $2300, in response to state campaign-finance information. He additionally duked $1100 to the despicable district legal professional on the market, Joe Early Jr.
Revelli now makes $129,495 as a hack assistant clerk Justice of the Peace, however now he’ll be going to as much as $184,694 a yr. He’s been giving money to governors since Mitt Romney, hoping to hit the massive bucks. He lastly struck gold on this yr’s Parker-Polito Going Out of Business sale.
Some of the opposite bust-out barristers who at the moment are getting early retirement with black robes have been handing money to wannabe governors like Shannon O’Brien and Tom Birmingham since 2002.
Charlie can’t handle a one-car funeral, however he can positive deal with individuals who deal with him.
Just ask new Superior Court Judge Claudine Cloutier, permitted by the Governor’s Council final week on a 5-3 vote regardless of her glittering credentials — $1750 to Pay to Play, and $2500 to Parker.
“I am pleased to submit” the nomination, the governor mentioned. Hey, she did the precise factor.
After this fireplace, every time I consider Parker, I’ll recall that outdated Kingston Trio traditional, “Charlie on the MTA,” and the way “he may ride forever ‘neath the streets of Boston, he’s the man who never returned.”
If we’re fortunate, that’s, he’ll by no means return. But we do have to make one small change within the lyrics. Charlie on the MTA is now swimming, not using, ‘neath the streets of Boston.
Worst. Governor. Ever.
Source: www.bostonherald.com”